There comes a time in life when we move a little too fast, forgetting who we really are. Progress is always good in life, improving at we do everyday. But after having so much time during recuperation last year, I had a long pause in life, appreciating the things that brought me where I was at that time. I had the time to reflect on the things I did and remembered all the things people around have contributed to me. It was really boring with so much time, but that was probably the time I felt really moved me onto the next stage in life. Today is a little more than 1 year since that time and I could feel I am progressing again. In life there are also bubbles, I knew that. Since last year I was growing so quickly and at one point of time I just took a slight pause in life, I gave myself a reality check, I told myself the bubble could burst anytime things go too perfectly for a long time.
In fact, I wrote "Trying not to fall off a cliff". It was not that I was going to do anything stupid but I felt the concentration I put in at doing things was paying off very well and it gave me more incentive to work even harder. As a result things progressed rapidly at time went by and I think things actually went too well, I had the results, I found new happiness and I did things that I should be doing. Sounds perfect enough. I hate to admit this, but I have crumbled under pressure. Just when I thought I could deal with everything I wanted to if I was determined, a change in fortune threw a huge blow at me. The inability to remain composed and being myself in such circumstances told me I have got lots to learn in life. The fact that my emotions were out of my control in a bad way gave me an indication I am not there yet. I am going to take a step back now and go into pause mode again. I would take this time in pause mode to thank two important people who made me who I am today.
First to my dear Mum, all these years you have given your absolute care and love to me and at this stage of life sometimes I take things for granted. I hope I haven't realised this too late because I will never have those sort of attitudes anymore. You and Dad have given everything possible to me in this life and I am so grateful for everything. I am not sure if you reliased this but I have put in a lot of effort to please you most of the time. I know it is my responsibility and it goes without mentioning but I would want to say that my best has been given to you. I know it has also been hard for you dealing with all the challenges and I feel like I haven't contributed enough. I will continue to strive in this life to make a good life. It's unfortunate we three have to leave home at this stage, I am not sure whether this is right sometimes. But I promise at least one of us will be with you when I finnish my degree. It is hard to handle everything in the family, from A to Z but you will always have us with you if you need us anytime. I feel like I am not making the right move now but your assurance has allowed me to continue to move to a higher level in life. I am sorry you have to endure 4 months like this, I hope the Sundays being on the phone with us will make things better. I can't thank you enough for everything and I will miss you so much. I love you Mum.
Hi Dad. I think I only told one person about this but nothing is ever too late right. I would like to say all my life I have been looking for a role model or sometimes we call it an "idol", I have seeked people from musicians to footballers to the rich to look for the right one. The further I looked and looked I could never find the right one. Little did I know the best role model I ever had was you. The person I have lived with for so many years, my own father was the greatest role model I will ever have. The qualities you possess is truly amazing and I am very devastated that I am only reliasing it after these many years. A true leader, a great dad and a friend to so many people. I never knew you had such a deep impact on so many people and I am in absolute admiration of what you have done. Firstly being a true leader is not as simple as it seems and only the strongest minds in this world can be leaders. Dad, your composure in life is the number one thing I have learned and it would continue to be one of my best qualities in life no matter what. For the times you kept your composure when dealing with even life-threatening situations is totally out of any book. Your success I am sure has also come a lot from this. Another quality that will always be up there with composure, its also linked to being a leader, it is your passion to empower people. I have never seen a person like you, having the pleasure of seeing people ride their bike on their own when you take off their training wheels. Your ability to instill such confidence and power in people is something I will learn so much from. Your effort in continuously fighting hard in making sure your staff being well-equipped with the latest happenings in this world and their English being at an acceptable standard is something few bosses would even do or care about. So many people have paid so much tribute to you over these years. I can say Uncle Ben Morais is one of the people that has truly appreciated your work. The words he used to describe you showed how much you have contributed to him. However, you will be sad to know some people have done the opposite, I do not want to mention much but I would say what you have done for them was something probably I may not be capable of doing.
What I mentioned does not even touch about what you have done for this family. You gave everything possible to allow this family to have the best life possible. The sacrifices and beliefs in making a good life will be in our hearts forever. The hard work, dedication and motivation you put in to build this family will be talked about for a very long time. There is too much you have done and it makes the word great or impressive seem weak. You probably didn't see much glimpses of what I am today, but I can confidently tell you that almost everything I do, I will make a thought of what you would have done. I have grown so much over the past few years and I am very happy to have you being my role model. I will continue to pass on as much of your teachings and examples in my lifetime, please be sure of that. I think you will be absolutely thrilled to know I am investing at this age. I could imagine us talking about investments, finance, the economy and businesses everyday and I think you will be more than happy to have this conversation with me. I still remember the days you read the Wall Street Journal, now I know why you do. I loved the book Rich Kid, Smart Kid and I know you did too. I can only imagine if I read it 5 years earlier when you asked me to. I think what I have put in writing has told quite a big part of how I feel, but I will continue to talk to you whenever I recall anything. Thanks for being the greatest dad. You are sorely missed.I love you Dad.
"Take a pause and appreciate the things in life"
Happy 4th of July!
~deyao~
